Ok, people, I'm going to make this one brief. I'm not sure how many of my classmates actually read this, so I apologize to my group members if this sounds a lot like my most recent essay. My mom passed away a week ago today. She was riding a freaking tractor and it flipped over and killed her. Give me a break. Does this stuff really happen? Have I really lost both my parents before my 29th birthday? '
However, my mom truly goes to rest with no regrets. She lived according to her own philosophy that every moment she was alive could very well be her last. She rebuilt some burned bridges, forgave unforgiveable wrongs, and went the extra 48 miles to make sure that everyone knew how much she cared about them. It's like she knew from the get-go that she didn't have as much time on earth as the rest of us. The annoying forwards, the endless phone calls to check on us, the intense love that was admittedly a little off-putting. All of it enabled her to leave this world in peace.
At her funeral, there were so many people that several didn't even make it inside the church. What a testament to the love for a person. What a testament to how many people she reached in her life. Funny stories, sad moments, and fond memories all were present as well. Her life had been a wild ride, but ended with high notes all around. First grandchild, wonderful vacation, successful and happy children, and a great peace in her heart.
I challenge myself and all of you to live the same way. I'm already going to stay with my low-paying job b/c it enables me to spend more time with my family. I'm not moving anywhere so i can be around my brother and his new baby, who I love dearly. I'm not obligated from guilt, but by love. Make sure you tell the people you love that you love them, don't go to bed angry, if you burn a bridge take the time to rebuild it, and mend your broken relationships. It's worth it. It's worth humbling yourself. The selflessness you show will bless you like it did my mother.
Some people have no relationship with their mother and father. Some have terrible ones. i have none b/c they are both dead. However, I'll take my 28 happy years and the lessons I've learned and call myself lucky. Maybe it's not fair to have them taken from me so young, but what's fair? What's enough for us? Should have lived and been ravaged by cancer like my dad? Or survived the accident to be wheelchair bound the rest of her days? No freaking way. Not her. My heart breaks, but I am hopeful. Tears fall, but I smile. I was unlucky, but I am lucky. I miss her deeply, but I know her place is in heaven. She earned it.
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I always read your blog, Philip. And I'm sorry about your mother's death. But everything you say is true--and I try to remember it when my mother calls me four times a day and asks me to take care of all those little things for her. And I try to remember it when I grade papers and answer emails and go to the grocery store, too. Life is too short...in the words of Tim McGraw, "Live like you're dying."
ReplyDeleteK. Smith
Eng, 226
I am sorry for your loss. I understand where you are coming from and feel the same way that you do. I lost my mom the month before my 21st birthday. I was fortunate enough to have a wonderful relationship with her. I cannot stand to see an individual mistreat his/her mother. They should be greatful that they have one who is there for them.
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